World Domination

That's so clichè.  I don't want to rule the world.  I just want to make it miserable.  As a young evil scientist, I had been told growing up that if I didn't like the way the world was, I should change it.  That's all I'm doing!  I don't want people to get the wrong impression of evil scientists like myself, so today's address to you, my loyal Machinoids, will be about the worst evil scientist in the history of everything: Dr. Wily.

Wily has been around since the first Mega Man game released in 1987.  Granted, he is older than me and has more experience being an evil scientist (MY game game out in 1993), but he uses the same old robots every single time.  And not only that, Wily for some reason decided it was a good idea to install these robots with a fatal weakness to each other's abilities.  It doesn't make any sense!!!  Why make your robots susceptible to ANYTHING?  At least MY robots weren't weak to specific types of attacks.

I ask you, loyal Machinoids, what does it take to be noticed as a viable threat to the future of the planet?  Should I build a robot named "Scissorman" and make it so he's weak against "Rockman"?  Or maybe I'll throw "Paperman" in the mix and see who will last the longest of the three.  Will I be labeled one of gaming's best video game villains then?

Probably not.  What I need is something original...something so sinister, it will FORCE people to respect me. Something that this world will look upon as one of the worst villains who ever lived.  Perhaps if I create a space station in the Earth's orbit, disguised as the moon, but with a planet-destroying death ray mounted on the outside.  I could call it, "Death Moon!"  Ehh, I'll have to work on the name.

Anyway, my minions, the moral of this story is that if you cannot successfully build an evil robot to do your bidding, without installing weaknesses, you are not a true villain, and must be punished for your pathetic attempts at evilosity (that's a real word that I just made up!).  Dr. Wily is a poor excuse for not only a villain, but a mad scientist as well.  How can you, with your nigh unlimited resources, make it so EASY for Mega Man to come in with his LITTLE BLASTER and foil your plans over and over and over again.  That not-so-awesome POSSUM did it to me once.  Did I go right back out and try again?  NO!  Unlike this fool, who has tried nearly 20 times and lost each time, I can proudly say that I have only been foiled ONCE, and not any more than that.  Because, for the last 18 years, I have been biding my time.  Sure, that possum might have lived to his natural life expectancy and died, but he DID have children!  Two of them, if I'm not mistaken.  And I will make them pay DEARLY for their father's insolence.

Until next time, my loyal Machinoids, and remember: Only YOU can prevent stupid robots with stupid weaknesses to each other from walking the Earth.  Just find out where their weakness is and blast them over and over again until they die!